After four weeks of Regular Season NFL Football the Dolphins stand at 0-4 with the worst point differential in the league, losing games by an average of 34 points, not scoring a single point in any 2nd half, so as you can tell it’s been tough.
Miami is very clearly tanking so rooting for them is very hard at this point and probably not the best thing for your mental health. For that reason I present the “Miami Dolphins Viewing Guide” where I’ll show you how to enjoy this waste of a football season and quit your suffering on Sundays.
Step 1: Root against the Steelers and Texans
Due to some trades a few weeks ago, the Dolphins now possess the 1st round pick of the Steelers and Texans. The logic is fairly simple in this one, just watch some other teams and root for them on a week to week basis.
With this step you’ll get to enjoy and root for teams like the Ravens, Chargers, Jaguars, Browns, Rams and many more. For the first time in years you’ll actually root for teams with talent.
Step 2: Watch the Development of young players
While this does mean you would have to watch the Dolphins on Sundays, you should try and ignore the scoreboard. Looking at 2020 and beyond the roster will be very different but some young guys may still be around in this next phase of the franchise, making their development important to the future of the team. The benefit of this step is you get to enjoy players like: Preston Williams, Jerome Baker, Christian Wilkins, Taco Charlton and Davon Godchaux.
Step 3: Watch the Development of Josh Rosen
Ok, I understand this step is very similar to No.2 , but Josh Rosen being a Quarterback should separate him from the bunch. It’s no secret Miami is looking at the 2020 QB class, so that leaves Josh Rosen as the likely backup or out of Miami. Monitoring the development for Rosen should be intriguing for Dolphin fans, because if he manages to show some good signs this year desperate teams may be calling in the future.
Step 4: Watch some Alabama Games
I urge Dolphin Fans to ignore the Nick Saban hate just for one season, and just enjoy the talent of their next QB. Watching Tua Tagovailoa play football is truly a joy as a fan, and picturing him in a Miami uniform (Not wearing #13) is beautiful. It truly helps ease the pain you feel on Sundays. If you aren’t watching him yet, make an appointment every Saturday to do so and root for him to win the Heisman, trust me It’s fun.
Step 5: Embrace the Tank
There’s no 2 ways about it, Miami is tanking. While the morality or ethics of this have been debated to death by fans and national media, there’s no changing the fact that this is Miami’s plan and it isn’t changing. As a Fan I implore you to embrace it and laugh at all the dumb silly memes on the internet and laugh as they score yet another touchdown on our defense.